MUSIC REVIEWS by Kristina Clayton
Dirty Kings Electric Dirt
Nice guitar riffs, smack-ass bass and rump-rockin rhythm coming from this trio of musicians. Electric Dirt is one of the better underground rock albums even though I think the singer is a bit tone def. That would not matter at a live show in a noisy bar. We would probably catch you doing a bit of the smash dance to the mostly 80’s, punked out hard rock with a little bit of blues. My personal favorite tracks are “So Happy” and “For the Lack.” I would not say this band is standard radio play, but a lot radio play sucks anyway. If you want piss off the parents, I highly recommend this album. [http://www.dirtykings.com] –KC
The Human Value
You’ll find yourself crawling through a dark alleyway with beautiful painful desires after listening to this album. The sound is hip, fast tempo for a zombie, chic rock with tolerable lyrics holding the music together – most of the time. Distortion is used appropriately as are good changes that a vampire could comfortably groove to. The lead singer has the sultry voice of a black widow spider. “Parts Per Million,” track 8, was a refreshing change making me feel like a lone fish in the ocean. Vocals are similar to the harmonizing sounds of Lovage blending soprano and baritone. Kudos to Mark Schmidt for his contribution of the vibraphone in tracks 3 and 8. (http://www.thehumanvalue.com) –KC
Darren Decide Temptation and the Taboo Part 1
What a great introduction to this album! Darren didn’t sing! When I got past the first song I wanted to start beating my head against the wall and not in a heavy metal way. It was the tick-tocking rhythm of “Little Ol’ Snake.” The musician can’t decide (ha) between punk rock or wanna be blues. Darren Decide, more like “Dare You Decide” to spend money on this album!? Well you might enjoy some singles like “Block Rock and Boogie” because Darren did not sound like he was puking while singing the dumb lyrics. (http://www.darrendeicide.com) –KC
AND ONE PORN REVIEW!
Pin Up Honeys Director: Van Styles of Hustler Video
[porn DVD]
Porn just looks better in fast forward, doesn’t it? For a Hustler video they had nice locations but kinda cold with a lack of storyline (eroticism). They had the bling but no ethnic diversity. If you like jiggles, skip to the second chapter. Third chapter the cocker starts dressing the girl in clothes that porn-stars wear only to undress her right after. Make sense? Sure, five minutes later. Go to the fifth chapter for some hot lezi action. I think the camera man should have gotten more involved. I would have. After that I was worn out and passed out. [http://www.hustler.com] -KC
