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travel: a quick trip to Miami

Miami – where the impossible is possible.

by Berenice Diaz

I must say I fell in love with everything in Miami. The sun, the sand, the ocean, checking people out [even the women with tons of plastic surgery with planet of the apes noses]. Everyone in Miami is beautiful. It came to a point in that I did not know where to look. My eyes were coming out of my face. It brought the devil out of me and a large smirk that I could not get rid of until I left.

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Unfortunately our plane ride to Miami was a disaster but as I say, you have to go to hell to reach heaven. Our flight to our first destination did not happen. We were told that there was a storm in Dallas and we could not land. The captain let us know that we were going in circles trying to talk to the airport to see if we could land from another direction. Their answer was ‘no.’ The captain then gave us the news that “,We are running out of fuel. And

Im must say I fell in love with everything in Miami. The sun, the sand, the ocean, checking people out [even the women with tons of plastic surgery with planet of the apes noses]. Everyone in Miami is beautiful. It came to a point in that I did not know where to look. My eyes were coming out of my face. It brought the devil out of me and a large smirk that I could not get rid of until I left.

Unfortunately our plane ride to Miami was a disaster but as I say, you have to go to hell to reach heaven. Our flight to our first destination did not happen. We were told that there was a storm in Dallas and we could not land. The captain let us know that we were going in circles trying to talk to the airport to see if we could land from another direction. Their answer was ‘no.’ The captain then gave us the news that, “We are running out of fuel. And… it is not looking good.”

Now what? I buzzed the stewardess and ordered alcohol. Nervously she just gave me the beer for free. I personally rather die drunk than die sober. My friend then turns around and asks me, “Are we going to die?” I thought it was the funniest thing ever. Luckily our pilot wasn’t that big of a dumbass and we landed in Austin. Waiting impatiently nearly having a panic attack we made it to Dallas at last. After loosing a couple of flights due to the delay American Airlines customer service receptionist let us know that there was no way we were going to make the flight to Miami since it was boarding in 10ish minutes and we were still on the airplane. We were going to have to spend the night at the airport and get the first flight to Miami at 7 am. I got very sad since our first night would be spent in an airport and not in our Miami hotel. Luckily an American Airlines employee that was having a good day unlike the others let us know that there was one flight to Miami that was still boarding but about to leave. Fortunately I’m in shape to run and that is what I did. I ran my lungs out in heels and for those that have been to the Dallas airport, you know it is huge. I ran down the escalator in heels like a madwoman and made it to my plane. We became to panic about our luggage. After all the flight switches and delays I thought we were going to be stuck with the same clothes (hand-wash the undies or turn them inside out). Luckily the last 2 bags at the baggage claim were ours. My guardian angel is definitely amazing. We grabbed a cab at 2 a.m. starving because we had not had any food the entire day due to all the ruckus. The cab driver wanting to juice up the trip asked us If we were hungry. What a smart man. He said he was going to take us near our hotel for some drive thru fast food. We started to see that he was driving about 45mph on the freeway. We looked at each other worried. He then took us to some street with lots of fast food chains. I kid you not. He drove in each one. They were all obviously closed. He still drove by the drive thru saying “, I think there is somebody there.” We then had to tell the guy to drop us off at the hotel and we were going to get room service. I think he got a bit mad since he realized that we had found out about his tourist trip. We then started looking at the money go up from 30,40,50,80, then finally $120. He dropped us off and we did not leave him a tip. What an asshole. I’m a broke traveler and now this? We check in the hotel and they charge me a parking fee. I started to laugh because the front desk had just seen us getting dropped off by a cab. You have to have eyes behind your head with things like this. That night we ate the most expensive cup of noodles of our lives. 12 hours of no eating made the cup of noodles taste like heaven.

This trip was a nonstop adventure. I believe I can make a movie with 3 sequels from everything we went through. From almost missing the flight, catching a cab that charged us $120, accidently taking the toll road and not having exact change and having to ask the person behind to spot us, jumping on a jet ski and not knowing how to swim, meeting Italians that closed down their restaurant for an after party, renting a car and nearly getting a dui, not sleeping our last night and driving directly to the rental car then the airport. Carpe Diem!

As much as I loved Miami, I could not live there. I don’t think there are any monogamous people in Miami. All the sex appeal would kill me. I would probably cheat. There are way more sexy men than women. Yum. If you are single and want to have fun, Miami is for you. For those jealous women that want to go to Florida but not stay in Miami with all the sexy eye candy, I suggest you stay in Pompano Beach and rent a car. I checked that place out and I must say it is perfect for those 50 and over. There you wont be surrounded by half naked young people. We went and immediately felt the jealousy from all the older women. As soon as they laid an eye on us they wrapped their husbands like an octopus. Quite silly. I will definitely be back to Miami. It is worth the trip. Next time I will take bug spray and more condoms.

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